Reader Writes In “I Just Pissed On My XBox 360″

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We normally save our reader emails for our Monday Mail feature but this one was so good it deserved its own post.A disgruntled XBox 360 owner (and who isn’t?) writes in:

I just pissed on my XBox 360

A good ole drunken piss, right on the XBOX 360 and into its vent holes on the side.

Came out pretty clear, smelled only a little bit of the alcohol that went through my digestive track.

It was probably the best piss I’ve ever had. I’m not sure if my XBOX 360 is still functional, although I’m not too concerned. It felt good to put it in its place… My Playstation 3 would never be bathed in urine, perhaps it would be worthy of a fine bath of a $500 bottle of wine upon its retirement, but as of right now no such bath is needed.

With Gears of War and Bioshock completed, I feel as if my XBOX 360 has little use to it. *Yawn* another game involving a space marine or some soldier with a huge gun. Shadow of Rome was a PS2 exclusive, remember that. I’m open minded, therefore XBOX 360′s upcoming catalog of titles seems rather unintoxicating to me.

I’m not sure if my XBOX 360 will work tomorrow, nor do I really care. I’m sure I could rub it down with some alcohol and sell it to some **** down the street for no less than $300 (Premium Pack) and spend the earnings on a few good Blu Ray titles or PS3 game pre orders if misfortune is to dance with my XBOX 360.

If I wake up tomorrow and find that it does not work, perhaps I’ll open up the XBOX 360′s case and leave a bit of fecal matter on the inside to stink up the future owner’s living quarters. That’d be a good one. I’ll make sure to head to Rite Aid across the street and pick up some fiber supplements to make sure I have a good bowel movement worthy of placing inside of the 360′s case.

What can we say? We hope your XBox 360 finds a good home.

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31 Responses to “Reader Writes In “I Just Pissed On My XBox 360″”

  1. Yeah, you wrote that, dont lie.

    Bioshock is very unique, so STFU dumbfuck

    You claim that no games is better than the 360 upcoming exclusives. Hey, you know what, if you shut this site down you would be able to save enough money to buy a 360.

  2. Pissed on 360 STILL > PS3!

  3. Wow. A drunk guy pisses on his 360. Well done to him for being a total retard.

  4. You know, the only time I thought that buying a ps3 was a good idea I was drunk.

  5. Thorax The Impaler Says:
    September 14th, 2007 at 8:56 am

    HEY! I didn’t know Static Bursts wrote in!

  6. yet again a microsoft item, I want sony news you fuckhead!

  7. I’m speechless.

  8. So a guy got drunk, placed a console on the hard wood floor and peed all over the console and the floor in the process.

    This guy is not housebroken. Typical PS3 fan.

  9. I agree with Xbot. I’d rather have a non functioning 360 over a PS3 anyday. Talk about fucking worthless kinda like the guy who wrote the email.

    360 FTW!!!!

  10. “sell it to some **** down the street for no less than $300 (Premium Pack)”
    Don’t see chrome… Maybe his alcohol soaked urine washed the chrome away?

  11. hey look another 360 update on SDF these guys sure love the 360

  12. With all the money he will be saving from not having to buy good 360 games and not having any good PS3 games to buy he can become a full blown alcoholic. Its a win win situation for him!

  13. I think it’s so funny when all the Microsoft fanboys come in and post their little bitchy comments. “Waaah 360′s better” “Waaah I love Halo it’s so good.” I have both systems. I play my 360 100 times more than my PS3, in fact the only PS3 games I have are Super Rub-a-Dub and that puzzle one where you hatch eggs. Yes Bioshock is a fucking amazing game but come on guys, shut the fuck up. The blog is hilarous and I hope they continue with it because it keeps making me laugh. Lets face it though, the PS3 is built like a brick compared to the 360. I worked at a game store for 8 months and from the ps3 launch I saw 1 ps3 come back and almost 3 360s a week.

  14. @Kiki

    Maybe that has something to do with playing the 360 a hundered times more that the ps3?

  15. Built like a brick? I dont buy gaming consoles based on physical dimensions. I dont care if the damn thing is made of seaweed, as long as it plays good games. Even if people were dumb enough to buy a console based on its looks and construction quality, no one would buy a PS# because it’s basically a super expensive George Foreman grill. Peoples 360′s break down all the time, and do they trash it and go buy a PS3? Nope! You know why? because they’d rather fix their 360 a doze times and play great games in between then waste $600 on a PS3 brick!

  16. As least they pissed on the core model. No one is stupid enough to piss on the premium or elite…

  17. Well I can’t complain my dog took a crap on my ps3 and the sad thing was it was the best thing that ever happen to it. What was really strange is my dog’s crap got reviewed and it got a higher scores than both heavenly sword and lair. Who would have figured.

    By the way great website it’s truly Craptacular!

  18. Where can I get me one of those pee’d on 360′s? I bet it’ll play software at a faster frame rate than than a shiny PS3. I remember when Ken Dumbass stated that the PS3 could push software at 120 frames per second at 1080P resolution. So what happen with Madden 08 Mr. Dumbass? No seriously what happened.

  19. IM GUESSING THIS SHIT WAS SETUP YOU FUCKING CUNTS, XBOX 360 DESTROYS PS3 SONY, THIS SHIT WAS SETUP, FUCK YOU SONY COCKS!!!!!!!

  20. I PISSED AND SHIT ALL OVER MY PS3 THEN GAVE IT TO MICHAEL JACKSON, XBOX 360 OWNS YOU MICRSOFT OWNS YOUR ASS FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK YYYYYYYYYYYOUIUIUIUIUIUIUIUIUIUIUIUI!!!!!!!

  21. This is explains it all

    http://www.gameklip.net/v/1569/

  22. I wont buy a 360 because i have a nice PS3 it comes with a blue ray, the new PSP and a beautifull 70″ Sony tv Men i’m glad i dont believe in saving money and go buy cheaper low quality consoles

  23. Ahaha, what an idiot. He could’ve pissed in the toilet and sold the X360 with the games for a hefty sum.

    But no, nothing more mature than pissing all over it, making a picture of it and proudly post it all over the internet.

    Is this the typical Sony Fanboy? :)

  24. Yeah that’s all the Xbox is good for, being pissed on.

  25. PS3UP,you might want to consider saving up some of that money and hire a tutor to help you with your grammer. Cause Men your english sucks donkey balls covered in cow shit.

  26. sounds like a dumbass move, Like buying the most expensive system with few games out. AKA the PS3.

  27. lol, its a core system, it doesn’t have the plated tray. I would piss on a core too.

  28. *yawns*

    i wanna know whats the real purpose of this site,because defending PS3 is not :3

    i have two theories:
    1)you guys work for microsoft/nintendo

    or 2) you guys will profit with this site somehow,maybe selling emails :3

  29. The real explanation was that the guy was so drunk, he mistook his XBOX 360 for the Piece of Shit 3.

    In order not to come off looking like a total retard to the rest of the world, he concocts this story about how proud he was to piss all over his 360.

    My advice to this retard?

    Get your eyes checked, learn to aim, and next time… paint a big red bullseye on the PS3 so you don’t make the same mistake twice!

    P.S. Being sober would help too.

  30. WTF guys. This kind of news sucks. I hate it when you guys discredit stuff about Xbox. I happen to own an Xbox 360 as well as a PS3, and I like both systems equally. To me, this site seems like a site for Sony news. I think if you are really trying to “defend” Sony (which it really does not need) then you should post some cool Sony stuff, not crappy Xbox stuff. “Make a case” for Sony not by discrediting the Xbox, but rather by crediting all the awesomeness of the PS3.

  31. PS3UP Says:
    September 14th, 2007 at 6:31 pm
    I wont buy a 360 because i have a nice PS3 it comes with a blue ray, the new PSP and a beautifull 70″ Sony tv Men i’m glad i dont believe in saving money and go buy cheaper low quality consoles
    —————————————————
    lol im guessing you are poor and some people gave you all that?

    You dont save money and the low quality console was a hefty 600 bucks dipshit

    I bet you butt rape sony’s head office, all of em, you’re their fucking manwhore

    get your head outta your ass

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